Orycon 35

Okay INKers, it's Orycon time again. Orycon has a really nifty online program. Hopefully this link will take you straight to my schedule, forever. Maybe. As long as it lasts, anyway. I'm not sure if the individual program schedules stay on their respective websites forever, or if they get overwritten by the current year. I suppose I could go test it out, but ... meh. Anyway, I have a reading. A fifteen minute reading. I'm more than a little nervous about that. Put me in front of lots of people to blather about pretty much any ol' subject, I'm good. Put me in a room with 1-12 people where I read my stuff aloud? I get all shaky and shy. What's with that? It's not like my words on the page are all that different from the words I say out loud during a panel. Are they? What's the difference?

Maybe in conversation and on panels my words have no soul, no emotion, no life. Zombie words. But on the page they come alive! They have fears and courage, pleasure and pain ....

It seems kind of backwards. I mean, I've had time to revise and polish words on the page (though I'm not supposed to, ahem, do too much of that.) In theory I'm prepared, right? All I have to do is read those words. I'm much more likely to make a fool of myself saying something wrong while yammering on. And yet, I'm more nervous about the works that I picked carefully. Very weird.

Maybe it's because I wrote them without any feedback. I mean, you can get feedback after the fact, but that's not the same as talking. When you're talking, you have the opportunity, even if you can't or won't take advantage of it, to read your audience's expression and reactions and adjust accordingly. When you're writing a book or short story, you just keep marching on and hope that you aren't marching right off a cliff.

Or maybe I'm just being silly. That wouldn't surprise me in the least.

I'm also Nanowrimo-ing. I've got a personal goal of 80,000 words this time. It's kinda touch-n-go as far as whether I'll make it or not. I'm on track for 50,000 so far (can't get cocky, especially this early on. Remember the time my office flooded? Yeah, me too) but behind if I want to make the eighty. And so I'll spend part of my time at Orycon adding words.

This year I'm doing something YA-ish. I'm not convinced it *is* YA. I'm not familiar enough with YA to make that call. But that's not my job. Right now my job is to write. Lots. Lots and lots.

Which I should go back to, but I think instead I'll make some tea because my butt is going numb.

See some or all of you at the con!

Finally, We're All Published.

Two hours before NaNoWriMo begins and I'm told Andromeda Spaceways #48 is out containing "Ash" my first published short story. How's that for writing motivation? Last of the INK group to become a published author, but better late than never, right? Thanks INKers for helping me grow as a writer. Today, I'm an author!

Accountability Cam is up and running at http://www.cscole.com/. I'll probably write for a couple of hours after midnight (less than an hour away now) and return around noon tomorrow after the daily workout. Finally preparations in order now. Go INK NaNo-ers!

Go, Kami, GO!

Another great INK moment - Kami has her first, of what I'm certain will be many, SWFA-qualifying sale. Congrats Kami!!

Link: http://www.sfwa.org/2010/01/beneath-ceaseless-skies-is-sfwas-newest-qualifying-short-fiction-market/

Loving the Process

I'm a short story's length within the 50,000 word Nanowrimo goal. How long the book will turn out to be, I really have no clue. Normally I have all kinds of clue by the 40,000+ word mark. I think I'm about 2/3rds done, but depending on how the plot twists and turns, I might only be halfway, or I might be within 20,000 words of The End.

Nanoing this year has felt a little weird, but a good weird. I feel really free. I've accepted the idea that I have enough writing skills that I don't have to rewrite something to death. If I go back through, it'll be to clean up details, not to 'polish.'

If I think about it in terms of rice, I like brown rice way better than the super-polished stuff anyway. Wild rice is full of awesome too. Somewhere along the way I stopped learning and improving when I rewrote something and started making my writing worse. I've had this proved to me many times now. So, enough.

That gives me much more time to develop new work and play in new stories and revisit ideas that I loved but sadly polished into a little bead that had about as much life in it as expired corn starch. That allows me to move on to the next story, whether it's the next in a series or the next in a whole new universe. And if I want to enrich a story with details or something, I'll have more time to do that if I'm not obsessing on the line by line on an extensive polish.

It's made me a little more careful about how I write those words as they land on the page, but it hasn't slowed me down all that much. Again, I've got over 43,000 words on the 16th day of Nanowrimo, and I haven't been writing non-stop. We've done housework and gone to meetings and such. I've been living a pretty normal life. I've been sick too.

I can do this. I can be a full time writer with this process, and produce more good stuff that I've ever dreamed I could. Plus, I'm not going back and ruining what I do write. Bonus!

But I'll always need my critique group, I think. I need to keep a sharp eye on what I miss, and what doesn't work, especially if it's a pattern with me. I already know I could do a lot more with setting. So as I go forward, I'm going to keep hunting for those weaknesses, and I'll depend on the Lucky Labs and INKers to help me out (and keep me motivated too.)

Ready, Set, NaNoWriMo Begins.

4188 words this morning logged in beginning at the stroke of midnight. Naturally, as the past three years tradition holds, I can't log into the NaNoWriMo.org website to register anything and countless email requests for a new password has been sent. If this year is anything like last year, come day eleven, I'll get a flurry of email replies with countless password resets. Anything received earlier would just get lost in the typical NaNo server crash(es). So typical. So NaNo season!

We've got a winner! Friend of INK Ken Scholes' 200-word Writing Contest.

Cross-posted from CSCole's LiveJournal page:

Today, after battling with our broken washer yet again (it's a goner for certain now), I discovered something that has put definite Squee! back into my step.

I did well in Ken Scholes' 200 word "The Tim Machine" contest. The contest was judged by three distinguished writers: maryrobinette, princessalethea, and jaylake.

I was just mentioning, reminding, Steve that Ken's latest book, CANTICLE" was getting ready to make it's debut and it was the one book purchase budgeted for this fall/winter. One guess as to what one of the contest prizes was.

OMG with Raspberry sauce on the side! An ARC copy of CANTICLE! THANK YOU, KEN! THANK YOU JUDGES!

Trust me, much dancing will occur throughout the rest of the week. MUCH dancing.

Please stop by Ken's LJ post here to read most of the other stories entered. All are incredible. All made me wish I were a better writer. To be included in this group is every bit as exciting as winning. Bravo to all!

Ken asked on his LiveJournal page if I might post my story. You can read it HERE. Naturally, after rereading it for the first time in months, I see so many flaws in it, I want to tear my hair out. I guess I just might be starting to understand the point of rewrites after all.

(P.S. The opening line from my story was a prompt used during a writing exercise at a late spring INK meeting. Kami and Steve might recognize it from then. I'm never going to pass up using prompts for exercise again.)

Catching their attention

I got a nice rejection today.  Part of it said: 

The story caught our attention but after consideration we’ve decided it’s not a piece
we can use.

Not too shabby, I say.  

My distractions are piling up, but writing is still happening.  I've been mainly editing novels and frowning at my legless story.  It'll all come together.  The part that's sticky right now is that I've got all of four days to send out an agent query or I'll have failed my goals for the month.  Ackity ack acka ack.  I always procrastinate with those things.  But I haven't been idle.  I've been reading Query Shark, and thinking about what the strongest thread in my novel is so that I don't muddy the synopsis with dumb stuff.  You know, the stuff that everyone, especially me, feels is so critical to the story but everyone with a few synapses firing in their brains and a somewhat-accurate memory of what the novel is about knows is just window dressing?  That stuff, the stuff I want to leave out.  If only it was color coded or something.  

Anyway, I'll get it done soon.  I'd better, or I'll owe the group a buck at a time I really ought to be saving my bucks.  Four days may seem like a lot of time, but it really isn't, especially since I want to try a fresh take on that synopsis.  It's not quite right as it stands.  I can do better.  I will, and I must do better.  

Gee, I haven't even got to the hard part yet, you know, the part where the book is out and I'm trying to build interest while still working on other books.  This is the easy part, y'know, even though it drags on and on.

Kami's State of the Writing

Lately I've been having trouble with ideas.  Oh, I have lots of ideas.  I even have some frozen embryonic stories that I can take out and ... okay, ew factor just set in.

But lately I've been dissatisfied with my ideas in general.  I don't want just any story idea.  I want one with that special something, you know?  It doesn't have to be unique, or pretty, or smart.  It does have to resonate.  I have to feel it in my guts, get that special tingly thrill, and when I work on it, have unnoticed hours go by before I look up from the page.  

Long walks and hot baths are in order.  In the meantime, I've got my novels.  I can live there happily for a very long time.  Still, it would be nice to have a short story come grab me by the throat before Tuesday's write-in with my writing pals.  I'll be looking at contests, prompts and anthologies in an attempt to spark something in time for that.  If none of that does the trick, I'll just have to work with what I've got.  

I want to produce, which means that I must produce.  Letting vague feelings of dissatisfaction get in the way of writing might lead to a habit of waiting until I 'feel right' to write, which might eventually grow into full-blown short story block.  I love writing shorts, and I don't want to go a really long time without writing one.  It's incredibly satisfying to write something and have it done in a month (sometimes even in a day!) and a great way to break a pattern of rhythm in a rut that can sometimes form when I'm working on novels, or worse, a single novel, every day all day.  As fun as it is to be immersed in a novel, there's a constant danger of complacency.  When I'm complacent, I'm more forgiving and apt to overlook things.  It's much more fun to work on a short story for a while and come back to the novel than to do the only other thing I've found to break the highway hypnosis, and that's to work from the back of the book forward.  I can do it, but I'm not real fond of it.

So that's where I'm at with writing these days.  That and trying to ditch this cold.  Oh, and I have a couple of short stories that are 'overdue.'  I'm keeping my fingers crossed!

Projects update + vague stress stuff

Worked on Masks today.  I'm delving into the section that needs the most manipulation, so it's going to be scary going.  But fun.  I think there's something compelling about fresh writing.  That raw energy (if carefully harnessed) makes the situations more vibrant, especially if the changes being made aren't a noun here and a verb there, but more in the direction of plumping up the action or depth of emotion.  

It's particularly rewarding to start working on the islands section 'fresh.'  On previous edits I worked from beginning to end fairly non-stop.  So by the time I got to the island, I was already fatigued from the long editing sessions.  I'm not fatigued this time.  

I also sent off a short story to be critiqued by INK.  Depending on what they say, I'll make some changes, polish it up, and probably bounce it off of the Lucky Labs before shipping it out.  It may be one of those stories that either works or doesn't, though.  There are certainly going to be rough spots in the prose and I probably didn't go far enough with the environmental descriptions, and that's fine.  What won't be fine is if the story isn't effective.  It's short and a buttony kind of subject and if I didn't do a good job of addressing it, it may just have to be tossed.  There's no aspect of the story I can 'save' if the heart of it doesn't work.

That's a different kind of story for me.  I'm not sure if it's because I picked a controversial subject or the fact that it's very bare bones--two scenes, short on the word count, and a simple conflict.  I won't go into what I think is its main weak point.  I'll let my readers get back to me on it.  But I'm curious to see if we see the story the same way.

Radcon is coming up.  Are we ready?  I'm not sure I am.  Physically, yeah I am.  I'll have clothes, supplies, and sometime in the next three days I'm going to take the kids to shopping with me for party supplies and groceries to sustain them through the weekend.  Emotionally?  I'm a bit of a mess, and that's not going to go away.  I'm sure I can maintain, but actually enjoy the con?  That'll be a stretch.  I anticipate lots of phone calls home, and reaching out on Skype to my DH so that my family can reassure me that everything is going to be okay.

This is a good time for me to be writing on stuff that has nothing to do with my concerns for the immediate future.  If I could do something about my circumstances besides applying bandaids, I would totally focus on that, but all I can do besides first aid is to worry, and that does absolutely no good.  A little escapism into my writing may be just what I need right now.  Speaking of which, I should get back to that now.  Don't worry!  This too shall pass.  If anything I hope it passes slowly, so I can adapt and adjust and do whatever I can.  When things zip by, well, all you can do is hang on tight.  

Just a Quick Link

Jay Lake linked to an excellent blog post on writing, jealousy and the process of becoming an author.  A must-read for INKers and Friends of INK!

I'm in doubt mode with my novel right now, so I'm focusing on a couple of short stories.  I finished one last night.  I'm not sure it'll hold up in the light of day, but I'm excited about the concept.  The other one is still stuck in psychic car chase mode.  Not sure if I'll be editing the one I'm excited about or writing more first draft on the psychic car chase.  Maybe both.  And who knows?  I may break out of my sad kitty face and work on the novel after all.

Fantasy Writing Plunges

I haven't been writing much fantasy lately.  I get a few words in edgewise here and there, but my focus the past bit has been on non-fiction.  I've got about 18000 words in so far, and I'm hoping to do some email interviews soon.  

At least I'm still editing and marketing fiction.  I got two rejections, and sent out two manuscripts.  I'll be sending out a third manuscript soon.  

My to-be-edited pile is really deep right now, so the break from first draft fiction writing is probably a good thing.  I have lost momentum on my Nano, though, so that's going to be a pain to start back up again.  Hopefully experience and determination will bail me out, otherwise, getting to The End on my Nano this year will be unlikely.  Is the Nano worth working on?  I still think so.  Come January, I may change my mind, but I still grin when I think about what's happened so far and what's ahead.

The next convention in line is Radcon.  This interesting convention in Pasco, WA is very well attended and has a loyal following.  I had a blast with C.S. last year and I'm really looking forward to Radcon this year.  Heck, maybe I'll even get a fun phone call while I'm there.  It can become an INK tradition!

Little pieces of progress

I'm getting there.

A bit ago I was whining about how my schedule disrupted daily writing. Well, I'm daily writing again. Sometimes it's just a few paragraphs, but that's all I need. I think. Here we are at June 13th, almost halfway through the month that will mark the halfway point in the year, and I have got to get hopping to get this thing done before December 31st because I am NOT buying a PC, thank you! Time pressure is good, though. Time pressure means that when I start writing excuses in my head (I'm really good at writing excuses, too) the overriding image will always be a rubbery-faced salesperson with a half-smile asking what kind of PC I'm looking for today.

In Masks, Mark is drunk, very very drunk. It's fun impairing him when important things are going on. I don't think he'll get drunk like this again in a long, long time, if ever. Ah, nineteen. Yes, we make stupid mistakes like this when we're nineteen.

It's my first official day as a jester and I've just been invited to a party for which I'm not in the least bit prepared. I know! I'll go find a cute guy and he and I will kill a bottle of high-percent alcohol together! This will relieve my stress!

Mmm hmm.

Did you tell anyone where you were going, Mark?

Uh, was I supposed to?

What if someone sees you?

Um, would that be bad?

You've already had an attempt on your life in this part of town. Might you not be attacked again?

What are the odds?

Can you figure the odds?

Um, hang on. Let's see. Uh ... what was the question again?

I rest my case. And there's a knock on the door. Who is it, Mark?

I hope it's someone who can pour me home ...

Typing Typing Typing

After hitting a rather rough patch in script writing, I'm back in calm waters, racing toward the end scene. I tapped out seven pages today and came up with a lot of meat for the story in those seven pages (plus blew up the entire Spanish fleet moored in San Agustin). I'm feeling my way forward, still, writing slower than my usual fiction speed, but I enjoy the thought process of picking way through the scene on description and dialogue alone. There is something very freeing about not having to worry so much on point of view and internal dialogue and thought processes.

That being said, I do miss the focus of a point of view character in description. I find myself slipping naturally into a point of view and I have to watch the language I use in the writing. It's a challenge, but one that is teaching me a great deal about word use and phrasing and the language in writing. Such a basic thing I've only paid attention to during the editing stage, and then only when it leaped off the page as poorly executed.

No matter how this script turns out, I think I'll find my fiction writing has improved vastly.

In other news, our computer is slowly dying, eaten up by a virus that nothing seems to clear. The system lags terribly, making typing these entries trying as my fingers go much faster than the cursor keeps pace with and ends up leaving out letters along the way. I might as well be on dialup for all the time it takes the pages to load. Very annoying to think about trying to key in a second draft on this thing. And I've been planning on working on the first edit of my script in July. Might be using the typewriter for that for now unless we can get this great behemoth running better.

For now, though, I have the typewriter and I'm still loving it.

Gender Genie.

Recently I discovered a great, fun little tool online called the Gender Genie. It guesses the gender of the author who has typed or pasted in some of their text. 500 words is better than just a sentence or two and it only takes a minute or less for results (depending on your connection). Plus it shows the keywords more often than not used by female and male authors.

Periodically, I enter some of my "Enthusiast" text and only once have I come up with "female." As you know, I want that body of work to sound as if written by a male and had previously asked a published author at the San Diego Writer's Conference for his thoughts (he said definitely male-written).

I hope you have fun with Gender Genie!

(For fun, I submitted this blog entry into Gender Genie and it said it was written by a female.)

And Verse

In prose its a stray sentence or phrase that makes me take notice. In poetry, it's a verse. Quite often, a couple lines of verse will endear the entire poem to me.

I adore Robert Frost for just this reason. Quite often, it's the last couple of lines of his that stay with me, such as the last line of "Mending Wall": He says again, "Good fences make good neighbors." In "Nothing Gold Can Stay," however, it is the first couple of lines that stay with me: Nature's first green is gold,/Her hardest hue to hold.

In Frost's "Death of the Hired Man," the lines come in the middle of the poem, and while they don't look like they have much to do with what is going on in the poem, which is a conversation between a farmer and his wife about the sudden appearance of an old man who isn't the best hired help, it actually ties in with a quietness that I prefer in poems: Part of a moon was falling down the west,/Dragging the whole sky with it to the hills.

I've been accused, quite often and rightly so, of injecting too many poetics into my prose writing. I started my writing life as a poet, though, and while I'm not as active a poet as I once was, it is still my first love in writing. Anytime I read a poetic verse that would be just as powerful in a story as in a poem, I want to cheer. Frost uses them masterfully, and I would recommend reading Frost to any writer who enjoys writing not only for the story and the characters, but those rare moments of capturing a truly powerful sentence on the page.

Sentence

I'm always on the lookout for a good sentence. I always sit up when I read them. It might be a clever turn of dialogue, a fresh description, or just a twist of phrase I've not encountered before.

I came across the latter of those in the book I just finished. Luara Ingalls Wilder's Little House in the Big Woods is a good book full of those fun details of a life lived differently from my own, which is something I enjoy reading about. It's a simple book, meant for younger readers, but I found it lively and not the least bit jarring or packed with head-whacking morals.

And then, I came across this line, which just made me smile and wish it were mine (the highest compliment I can pay to another writer):

Laura and Mary held tight to each other's hand, at the edge of the field, and watched with all their eyes.

"All their eyes." I just love it! I immediately pictures huge, round eyes staring for all they were worth, drinking in every drop of the scene. It's just a great phrase. And I love finding new turns of phrases. This one isn't even new . . . it was written over 80 years ago! That's even better, finding old turns of phrase that have fallen by the wayside. I can pick them up, dust them off, and give them a good home.

It's an odd hobby, I admit. Just ask me about my other one someday . . . collecting words that begin with "be," the less used the better! My favorite right now: betwixt, closely followed by beholden.